I ducked out.. and I am back..

Ok.. so I have been gone for a little hot minute.. I know.. I am so sorry guys.. Things have just been so damn busy. With what have I been doing with my time you ask??
Well.. I had my best friend from Chicago out here for a week and a half. We started our record label back up.. So that has taken up a lot of time. I just got pro tools to start producing music again. And really just networkin with a lot of local artists, and friends that are into music.. Besides that, I am still in school people!!.. And with another class under my belt, I am just tryin to do what it do.
So, what has been up you ask? Well.. Let's see.. Besides all that, I have honestly been taking the solo road. Enjoying my life the way it is. I have decided to cut almost every guy from my roster. Brandon has been long gone.. and good riddance.. I have decided to leave alone Will.. Yeah.. And not in a " I have said it before kind of way" but a "I am officially done and over with his shit" way..
It is stupid.. I know.. But here goes why... I have a music myspace page up for our Record label.. And HE added me.. Yes.. not me adding him.. And I accepted his add.. And saw he is in a relationship and his number one is some girl that has a picture up of him and her as his default.. Oh well.. That was it.. I no longer have any feelings for him.. And fucking me will be out of the question.. Real life.. I will not put my heart through his bullshit for another day!!!
SO I am rolling solo, and I am not looking. Real life.. I am sure I will write more about the closing on the will chapter. I can't fit 9 years of feelings or loss of feelings in a paragraph or 2.
I have also been planning my trip to Hawaii for my 10 year high school reunion. While doing so I found a lost friend's sister on Facebook. I got excited because for the first time in 6 years I thought I was close to getting back in touch with a dear friend Kristy. I reached out to her sister who then relayed my message and now I am in touch with my long lost friend. I did feel a little lost without her... But none the less.. I feel a lot more whole now :)
I gave up on the whole turning Phillip into something more.. I dont think it could have.. But, I deaded the idea in my head. And probably right so!
I can't think of anything else to talk about right now.. I am all discombobulated.. Oh.. LOL the other day, I was hanging with my friend Marvin.. Who needed me to take him to drop off money with someone.. As we were pulling into the parking lot, I told him I think I know someone that lives up in here.. His name is "Lt".. that ended up being the person he was droppin the money off to. Well.. Lt and I had a lil rendevous back in the day.. I didn't really like him.. I think he said something ignorant and I just cut off communicado.. So he comes up to the car.. and he's looking at me confused "like.. dont I know you from somewhere.. " and then he asks that exact question.. I tell him yea and explain why I left him high and dry.. And then he asks for my number.. I am borderline in a good mood, and a sarcastic mood.. So I give it to him reluctantly.. Whatever.. And he blows my phone up. I mean 2hours after I gave it to him he called like 4 times.. I finally answer.. I broke it down to him.. Like look.. I am happy where my life is now.. I dont want a relationship.. and I really dont want what I think you have to offer.. I am coo.. Lol.. heartless right?... oh well.. anyways.. I will try to make it tomorrow.. I know.. I dont wanna say it, cause if I do.. I wnt be back tomorrow.. so see you later :)

Earth Hour??

Ok, so I partaked in the hour of lightlessness.. Which I dont think is a word.. But I just made it into one.. Yeaaaaah!!
So, I figured if vegas was gonna turn off the lights to the strip and the all famous Welcome to Las vegas sign.. I should do the same. So I did. And to tell you the truth.. I fell asleep.. But I know at 8 i woke up to turn off my computer and I even turned off the phone!! wow.. I did however keep the fan on.. And that was something I compromised on. I figured, if earth day didnt want me to turn the tv on or use my computer maybe they give me my fan. If i have no fan, I have no sleep. So I did my part.
But I am so proud that they say Billions of people participated. Right on fellow man kinders.. So proud of all you people.. I am sure there are a few million though that have no electricity or stuff like that to waste energy.. So for those people well.. thank u for not putting more crap into it. I am sure us americans have your waste covered!!!
Anyways.. What a lame post.. well.. Sorry I jsut woke up.. and I am half ass watching Sex in the City. So whatever.. Anyhoo.. I am outtie.. I will try to write tomorrow.. Atleast with a lot more things to say then earth hour.. I feel like an ass for writing about it.. But did you participate in earth hour?

A much needed break

So life has all these crazy loopty loo's, and winding roads that sometimes I take a detour. I had to take this detour. If not for anything else but my sanity. I had a bunch of things coming at me and I did try to prioritize my time a little better, but for cripes sake I am a Libra.. I love procrastination and I love being lazy.
Lets see whats going on?... Well, I got into a set schedule.. Really I had no choice. I was up before the sun gets out every morning, helping out family. Basically what that entails is picking up my brother and dropping him off at work, then bringing his daughter here to be watched until his wife gets out of work. Both of them changed their schedules, and sooooo. Here we are to help... So as soon as i get back with baby, I have to get my other niece ready to go to school Then actually take her. Not to mention I have to go to school also. Aside from school, and family life there has been my socializing life. Which should be the majority of time. I spend a lot of time bullshitting with people.
Lilly (my dog) has taken a front seat also. I have been religiously taking her to the dog park. She needs it, and the walking sure does help me out. I have been meeting the coolest people.. It is kinda funny though, cause I run into the hottest guys ever, and then they kill it with a small yapper dog, here I am with a Pit Bull.. and he has a small ankle biter. LOL.. I can't help but laugh at that. I mean really? I feel more masculine than the guys... Ha ha If it aint pit.. it aint shit right? Apparently not.
I have actually taken a slight break from any and all guys I have been dating. Even trophy! Especially Brandon. I figured fuck em! and not in the literal term, with good feelings.. I mean.. to hell with them.. I told phil that I am gonna cut everyone from the roster and start my harem all over again. So far so good!. I do still talk to my trophy, but sex not in a while, and really conversation and hanging out also not in a while. So I am done!
I have still been on my phone like a crack head. I have bought little gadgets and gizmos for it. I am always on it.. I love it. Ha ha.. I know crack head right.. I know..
I am trying to get creative.. but it just isnt coming to me.. I am in a cluster fuck.. my mind is in a rut.. I am trying to get it out. I will try to come back later today and really unload ok.. But I wanted to come back just for alittle..

I didnt dissapear

Good lord guys, my apologies. I was sick beyond belief. I had um.. well I dunno what exactly I had, but coughing, body aches, fevers and headaches. Plus mucho fatigue. I spent a lot of hours laying in bed dead. haha..
So whats been going on? What has everyone been up to? Me? well besides being sick.. I have been playing with my phone.. ofcourse.. who would have thought? Nah, but for reals... I havent been doing much. I have been hanging out with phillip here and there.. He actually braved it with me and my cooties. Lol.. wow.. this is starting off so boring.. I am so sorry.. I feel like I am cheating you..
Oh, so I filed my taxes.. which I know I said I wasnt the governments bitch anymore.. But yet again I am.. haha.. so quick huh i get on my knees.. Well.. I filed my taxes after waiting forever from the Royale to give me my W-2.. I thought because I made like 8 thousand less this year than I did last year.. I may actuall get a decent little return.. HA HA HA.. yeah right.. I got back 256.. which I went and checked the status at the wonderful IRS site.. and well.. it all went to my student loan.. NIIIICE!! which hey.. I cant complain i havent paid it.. in like.. EVER.. but seriously i had made every intention of payin it as soon as i got my settlement.. but Hey.. uncle sam decided to take it now.. how fuct up is that though? I am unemployed and it was only for 256 bucks??? why would he even bother taking that shit from me? haha.. anywhoooo.. i am again that freckeled red headed step child I was braggin not to be..
So I watched Greys anatomy last night.. which I usually watch every thursday and pretty much have since it started.. Well.. I had heard the rumors that they were gonna get rid of katherine heigel's character Izzy.. which if you watch.. all those Denny hallucinations were really bothering me.. I was kinda irritated by it.. But Last night's episode was kinda fuct up.. She had her interns diagnosing and treating "patient x".. come to find out patient x has cancer.. come to find out after.. Izzy is patient x.. seriously.. is that how they are gonna go out?.. fuct up.. that was kinda sad.. which the show is.. but whatever.. that shit bothered me..
I think heroes is starting to get interesting again too.. It took a little break from being cool to just being a soap opera and pretty predictable.. but now its getting good again.. I am so sorry guys this shit sucks.. but I am still a little nyquiled up and I still yea.. but i wanted to let u guys know i was still alive.. and i waz thinkin of ya.. how mushy huh.. well thats it for today.. ill try to make this a habit again.. lol..

They have an App for what??

After spending 2 days and 2 nights like a crack addict on itunes App store... I have realized.. this phone is beyond the shit. They have an app for almost everything. They have Urban spoon.. which in my opinion sucks.. The only thing thats even cool about it, you shake it, the reel spins.. oooooooh.. kinda lame... when i want to eat , even if indecisive about where.. i dont think a shake is gonna do it.. simply because everytime i shaked it.. the same restaraunts came up.. so I whatevered that app..
Flash lights, lighters, calorie counting, step counting.. they even have a bubble wrap app.. Which, as someone who loves bubble wrap.. I really felt that I was about to have a lot of fun with it; WRONG.. it was kinda lame.. it pops, yes it does.. but i think its the feeling u get when you are actually poppin those bastards!
I downloaded this stupid app.. its an intimacy tracker??? what is that you ask? well you can pick 4 different categories and you can name them yourself.. (ie dinner/movie, sex, phone time..etc) and anytime you do something u categorized, you go to the app and you keep your tally. That way you can look back for the month and see how romantic or how much time you spent with your significant other.. LOL.. wow really? And the thing is password protected so your S.O doesnt get to see that you keep a record of any love given.. Who thought of some bullshit like that? I couldnt see why anyone would use it, nor make it.. I give it a lil while till they have an app that multi functions for you.. we shall see huh..
So I woke up early again.. Today I have no one to blame.. which is unusual.. thats my shit, blaming others..haha Nah, i really did just go to bed really early and get a nice 10 hour sleep...Nice.. I was ready to wake up and clean.. And then I layed in bed, and got lazy.. all within an hour and a half.. how you like that. But Yes, I need to clean this room, and Lilly proof it.. I am going to have to think like a dog for a split second.. I gotta think of anything that may look or smell appealing to her.. I am goin to try to make it 2 days withouth a mess..I am sure I will figure something out for my saturday.. After all it is a beautiful day.. I can see the sky from my window.. and the sun is shinning bright.. Alls that is missing.. a beach... well.. thats the price we pay to live in the desert.. Anywhooo.. I think I shall start mustering up the strength to get up and clean... I have been lazy far too long.. so I hope alls of you have a great day.. peace love and chicken grease!!

I know, brief intermission

So, I didnt ditch you guys for my iphone or anything like that.. no.. haha.. nah I did to a certain extent.. To another extent.. No, cause I lost internet for 2 days. My router burnt out. So, I apologize for not being able to share my crack with all of you..
So what have I been up to? Well.. let's see.. I went and got my Iphone. I have been on cloud 9 with it. I cannot lie. But there has been more to life than my handheld amusement. I have been spending a lot of time with Phillip. I gave him my old cell phone, so we been texting a lot, as well as hanging out. I met his new little girl.. The jury is still out on her. I think her insecurity will blow it with my bestie... which hey.. whatever.. hahaha..
I also have been talkin to trophy.. Which is cool.. nothing spectacular.. he decided to give up on the 3some after the girl that i put work into decided to lie to him about something. I guess he wrote her off..
And ofcourse Brandon is back in the picture... I told you I was a glutton for punishment. It actually has been cool, but I have been playing it by ear, and not giving more of myself than he is giving of me. Infact, I dont even call him anymore, he calls me.. and it will stay like that, for however long I keep it that way. He is now eating out of the palm of my hands..
Lets see.. Oh my gosh.. My dog is having issues.. I understand, she is bored. But yikes, this biyatch has fuct up my room everyday so far this week that i had school... anytime i left the room, she tore something up, and now shes starting to chew up the carpet.. YIKES!!! I know, it is my fault for keepin her cooped up.. but oh well.. not much on my mind today huh.. well.. ill try to post something better tomorrow guys.. just wanted to say i was thinkin of you

I am not the governments redheaded stepchild

No sir-ree.... I am not.. After many years of getting the taxes raped out of me painstakingly from EVERY check.. I am not the governments' bitch anymore.. What a relief. My anal muscles (sphincter) can relax and just chill..
I was way stoked to find out about my unemployment.. But, just newly arrived in the mail today was my first education benefit check. I get a monthly amount because my daddy-o served in the good ol Vietnam war and literally busted his back for whatever that shit was for.. Alls I know is Pops made it so I can get paid to learn.. How you like that?
I totally made up for the money I spent on the Iphone.. Which by the way hasnt come yet. I dont know if saturdays are considered a "business" day.. but since i consider every single day a day off.. I think saturday should be a "business" day. I want my freekin phone PEOPLE!!.. So I am no longer late on rent. As a matter of fact, I am early. WooooHOOOOO!!!
Damn, it is so sad that I get so happy about money. But it really was coincidence that I even had a check there. For I was just on the VA website trying to figure out 1) how much I am getting (by the way, it is 200 summin less than i thought..but whatever) and 2) how long would it be till i saw that little liberty statue check in the mail??? So I am a little lost as to where I am going to find this out, so I call my mom, she has dealt with VA before.. she told me.. "well.. if you needed to do something, or you were getting something.. you would have heard from them by now, you have been in school for about 3 weeks" .. enough said.. I knew what I needed to do now.. take my fat ass to the mail room and check that shit!!
Exactly what I did.. I saw the letter from VA.. i started getting goose bumps.. like whoa.. Mom just told me I would have heard from them by now.. I decide not to read it yet, get the rest of the mail out of the box.. Remember.. after all you did try to see if your Iphone was here first off.. So, i grab the rest of the mail.. And I am just sifting through it.. I really didnt care, I was really looking for something about my Iphone.. And then I see it.. A government check envelope.. Thinking there is some kinda mistake or something.. I see my name on the check.. This just happened and I just thought it up. IT was a little bazaar.. But whatever.. I am now, unemployed and make more than I did while I was working. Now that is what I call bazaar.. Now, I get to ponder what I am going to buy with my next unemployment check (after my negative balance is wiped out).. Is unemployment the new young persons retirement? I will so work till I am 80 if this is. Give me a few year retirement here, I will work with my walker.. Swear I will